Last night I forgot to turn on the heater so when we all woke up, our home was a frosty 60 degrees. It was heating very slowly, so when it was time for school–online distance learning–I wrapped Poppy up in a blanket to keep her warm. Shortly afterwards, she reported that she had gotten in trouble in class for wearing a blanket. It was school policy that kids be fully dressed in school-appropriate outfits to be “ready to learn” and that blankets weren’t allowed. Poppy’s teacher suggested she put on a sweater.

Guys, we need to do better than this. We need to BE better than this. And I want to say at the beginning here that I have a number of wonderful friends who are teachers and a number of friends who are parents and a number who are both and we are all, ALL doing the best we can right now. This is not a rant against teachers.

This is a rant against the mindset that we can re-create school at home. That we can decide what’s best for students and parents without actually asking students and parents. We need to challenge our thinking here. We need to do better.

It seems like every school and maybe even every class is handling distance learning differently. Currently Poppy’s school is 100% online. Her class format requires her to be online, with her camera on, for the entire school day, from 8:10am to 1:10pm, for live instruction. We were told that there would be times that Poppy could step away from the computer and that she wouldn’t be on screen all day but that turned out to be the short breaks she gets for “recess” and “lunch.” Otherwise her entire day is simply a traditional classroom attempted to be re-created at home. But unlike the traditional classroom, she is not allowed to socialize with her classmates during recess and lunch. The chat room is shut down because the teacher cannot monitor the students so there is no free conversation.

In addition to the no blanket policy, students are also not allowed to snack during class time, as that should take place before school and during recess. They do not have to wear their school uniforms–although some other schools do require that–but they are expected to be seated at a desk or table just as they would be at school.

But home is not school. And do we really NEED to try to make it so? Poppy told me she would rather sit in bed wrapped in a blanket wearing her pajamas to do school. And I have to ask–why not? The bed is comfortable. Blankets are comfortable. Pajamas are comfortable. Snacks are comfortable. But apparently this makes them not “ready to learn.” According to what expert? Are we really saying that in order to be ready to learn, students must be physically uncomfortable? Is this really necessary?

Decades of research into child development and child learning shows that children are hard-wired to be “ready to learn” every minute of every day. That’s how a child’s brain works. Poppy is equally ready to learn whether she’s wearing her school uniform or bundled up in a blanket. All children are. In fact, research shows that children are MORE ready and able to learn when they are comfortable. Studies like this one show a 16% improvement in academic performance among students in classrooms that were configured with natural lighting, flexible seating, and student choice of environment. There is a huge movement, in the right direction, of reconfiguring classrooms to accommodate flexible seating including couches, bean bags, standing desks, carpets, etc. resulting in increased learning. Yet here at home, which is the ultimate reconfigured classroom, we’re back to chairs and desks and zero comforts like clothing choices (pajamas) and blankets. And the best part of all is that it’s me, the parent, who gets to enforce this. Yay!

These policies also assume that our home is a comfortable environment–like, not 60 degrees–which quite frankly in the middle of this pandemic and massive unemployment is not always a safe assumption to make. It also assumes I have a separate table or desk and space for my children–both of them–to work. Glad I don’t live in a tiny apartment, or a motel room. This puts extra stress and pressure on me, the parent, to try to imitate a traditional classroom environment even though that’s both impossible and already recognized as non-ideal for learning.

We need to do better. It’s NOT that Poppy is not ready to learn. She is ready to learn. She is biologically wired that way. So if she’s not learning, then the fault is NOT that she’s too comfortable or in the wrong environment. The fault is in what’s being taught and the way it’s being taught.

And again, I’m not trying to blame teachers here. They’re basically the lowest on the totem pole (aside from families and students, who are lower) as far as what they’re expected to teach and the method and conditions under which they’re expected to teach it. They’re subject to a line of authority that goes from school administration to district to school board to county to state laws.

And out of all of these decision-makers, not a single one are seeking the input of the biggest stakeholders in education–the students. Everyone has decided that Poppy would learn best if she were sitting at a desk wearing approved clothes with her camera and microphone on. But Poppy is the expert on Poppy, and she assures me that she thinks she would learn better if she could sit in bed in her pajamas wrapped up in a blanket with a big bowl of snacks. And as her parent, it would be the best and easiest for me to make my own decisions about what helps Poppy learn. And since I’m being forced to have this take place in my own home, what better opportunity to customize Poppy’s learning environment to maximize her learning in the ways both she and I know work for her?

And even if it didn’t improve her academic performance, it would make her much happier and more comfortable. She said she would like distance learning more. Why can’t we have that? Because it’s inconvenient to the school or the district? Because the school board has decided what is best for her without checking with the people who know her best, which is me and her? This is an awful, stressful time for everyone, children included. Families are stressed to the maximum and children are not immune to that. It is incredibly stressful to be a kid right now. They are carrying a much heavier burden this year than I ever did as a child.

Why can’t we use this as an opportunity to really reach kids where they’re at? Instead of arbitrary restrictions set down by people who didn’t even ask those of us on the receiving end, why can’t we broaden our thinking? It’s all a bunch of hit-and-miss at this point, and I get that we’re in uncharted waters here. I do. But people are making all of these decisions without even asking the kids and parents what would work best.

I just want some flexibility. I want a little input. I want someone to ask Poppy what her dream distance learning environment would look like and I want someone to make that happen. We just really need to do better here.